just anything under the sun depending on my mood. I am particularly moody so a lot of them tend to be emo stuff. I am trying to make it more candid though.... so anything goes! :)
If paranoia, worry and vanity could kill, I'd probably be dead by now. Most likely more because of the former two than the latter.
But a little self-indulgence for vanity's sake... Thank you for the compliments. I need it so I can suck the positive vibe they bring bone dry and boost that dwindling reserve of optimism, patience, confidence and faith. I am flattered really. Keep them coming! :)
I was at this club last night, and thoughts of you ran through my head. At one point, I kind of searched through the crowd hoping to see you there. Why did I not go crazy like I did last night when I was with you? Why did I not loosen up when I was younger? Oh yeah, because people take advantage of it and it seems my best interest is only safe with my college buddies.
Anyway, it's not like we've gone out a lot but I guess I can't forget the fact that this was how we bonded. Well, aside from the fact that we shared a ride most nights back then. I liked you then, probably a lot to the point that I'd consider those bonding sessions as a little more than that - a way to enjoy your company. Funny how I started to like you over a glass of an alcohol-laden drink. The word still sticks: "analytical".
I guess conversations get me a lot but not to the point that intimidates the hell out of me. Just enough to show your interest and thoughts of what I think of as my complexities.
I had thought there was something there. I wanted for something to be there but maybe I was just dreaming, maybe I was too dense and foolish or maybe I was just put on the spot too early. Or simply maybe it's not really a match and my time has not yet come. Still I wonder what happened?
So I finally got to finish The Time Paradox and thanks to powerbooks sale I have new books to devour. Finally! it sure has been a while.
-Incarceron (my first ever hardcover book and I want more! How about a library?)
(-Sapphique : i got the ebook as i couldn't wait)
-Mortal Instruments Trilogy
-Zahir
-Night
-Hunger Games trilogy
-Love in the time of Cholera
Hopefully, there'd be more like Harry Potter (oh yes i haven't read a single book from this series) and The Atlantis Complex.
I've moved on
Now I see
You've also moved on
And I am happy (relieved).
Oh yes! We're even!
You have your life back
I have my life
Or do I?
But are these only imaginings
Foolish thoughts
Hopeless
Anxious
Restless
Pathetic
Are we even?
I found myself writing notes for three different people to express my condolence on their loss of a loved one. While I am not exactly friends or family with all of them except for maybe my High School teacher who i was fond of back then, all times I struggled to write something other than condolence or copy another's note. Why is it hard to find the right words to express my empathy on a personal level? Somehow condolence doesn't quite capture it and seems overused, generic and impersonal. I am not sure if it's right to mention the words loss, sympathy(which technically expresses pity), sad and difficult time. I guess the best way would be to say that they are in your prayers. Let's take a moment
Eternal Rest grant unto the souls of our loved ones (no longer here with us) Oh Lord
And let perpetual light shine upon them
May they rest in peace
Amen.
And for the living:
Make us strong and Keep us in Your love as we go on our life's journey.
On another note, it is not uncommon for me to think of death or dying. My vanity is a huge factor or so it seems as evidenced by the choice I made or the thought I had when discussing dying by drowning or burned alive. While one was thinking of the suffering involved in either case and another on what will happen to their loved ones, I was thinking that none would look good afterwards. :D However, with my manner of driving I kind of think that my risk of dying is high which would also be a mess.
I am not suicidal nor I am ready to do so but sometimes it seems an enticing thought, if only to realize your worth or lately if only to make work go away and give you breathing space. Now that's pathetic.
Happy Vday everyone!
Until I have someone to celebrate it with I guess it's just any another day for me. You could probably say I just don't get it. how about make me then?! :D
sunset at Anna Maria Beach (or Holmes?) 11.28.2009
Love Like Rockets
Angels and Airwaves
I held my head as it left the ground,
The belts grew tight as the blast grew load,
A loving wish whispered in my ear,
Please lead with grace, all the best my dear,
Yeah, It's like
I held your hand as I pulled you in,
Your lips sealed tight, ready to begin,
I kissed you first, then you kissed my ear,
If I ask you once, will you ask me every year?
Do You Feel Alive? (Imagine, Imagine)
Do You Feel Alive? (Imagine, Imagine)
The Sun it set in the night time sky,
The stars they cast a glow upon my eyes,
The Earth itself a burning ball of light, yeah, it's like
And our first love was ignited late that night
Do You Feel Alive? (Imagine, Imagine)
Do You Feel Alive? (Imagine, Imagine)
The stars in your eyes light up the sky with thoughts, light and fire and sound
The stars in your eyes light up the sky with thoughts, light and fire and sound
(Do You Feel Alive? (Imagine, Imagine))
The stars in your eyes light up the sky with thoughts, light and fire and sound
(Do You Feel Alive? (Imagine, Imagine))
The stars in your eyes light up the sky with thoughts, light and fire and sound
(Do You Feel Alive? (Imagine, Imagine))
The stars in your eyes light up the sky with thoughts, light and fire and sound
(Do You Feel Alive? (Imagine, Imagine))
The stars in your eyes light up the sky with thoughts, light and fire and sound
as the day breaks over Utah's skies on the way to Houston. 12.27.2009
Brand New Day
by: Joshua Radin
Some kind of magic
Happens late at night
When the moon smiles down at me
And bathes me in it's light.
I fell asleep beneath you
In the tall blades of grass.
When I woke the world was new.
I never had to ask.
It's a brand new day.
The sun is shinning.
It's a brand new day.
For the first time in such a long, long time
I know I'll be okay.
Most kind of stories
Save the best part for last.
And most stories have a hero who finds
You make your past your past.
Yeah, you make your past your past.
It's a brand new day.
The sun is shinning.
It's a brand new day.
For the first time in such a long, long time
I know I'll be okay.
This cycle never ends. You gotta fall in order to mend.
It's a brand new day.
It's a brand new day.
For the first time in such a long, long time
I know I'll be okay.
imagine this: everyone knowing the offer and starting salary and the increase(s) after that of batchmates and lower batchmates. In my case that was my reality and it sucked. Salaries are confidential for a reason, I knew that first-hand.
Fast-forward to 2011: salary is shared to a very select few in utmost confidence and security. The slightest hint that somebody might have known it especially a batchmate by accident leads to paranoia. If that accident is your fault, you somehow hope that the other person, more so a senior with treat it with respect and act professionally not enquire about your age, correlate that with your salary and intentionally slip the digits to another colleague from your same circle. yes, it is human nature and apparently he is not that type of person so the only alternative left is to appeal to his discretion directly for the digits to remain a secret and confidential as they should be. It should have been an obvious and given fact but considering the person's nature you hoped that would help drive the message: YOU ARE EXTRA SENSITIVE ABOUT IT, YOU WANT TO DROP THE ISSUE AND KEEP IT A SECRET.
The person then goes on to apologize not for the act of revealing the digits indirectly to someone else with some statement like "XXX is doing well at XX, i mean xx(age)". It's hard to imagine whether or not he/she pities you with that statement but what the heck, why does it matter to you anyway? You are already way up there. The person instead apologizes for placing the payslip on your desk. No apologies for lying publicly of not seeing the digits as well. Did somebody just miss the point?
*it is tempting to report this incident just to let people know that not everything are to be taken as a joke. When I say extra sensitive you have to be serious and professional about it.
By now, our counterparts have grown used to our crazed shopping habits at outlets whenever anyone of us are sent on assignment. When asked for our activity for the weekend, it's no longer a surprise for them when we answer in chorus: "shopping".
Cha was asking me how much Coach bags can go for when on sale in the US. That got me reminiscing of my outlet store shopping experience. Being a sucker for deals, I was in for a treat and enjoyed every minute of it. I guess for now I'll let the pictures speak for themselves. And yes, I went crazy. In 4 months, I visited round rock 3x, San Marcos 3x and the one near Bradenton 2x. I don't think I ever went home empty handed though I had to restrain myself during the latter parts of my assignment lest I risk exceeding my baggage limit. I originally thought it was 70-70-50. On the last day I found out, I can actually go for 70-70-70. Too bad!
watch out for the sales!
a 30-minute drive from where we were at
apple store @domain
i thought you'd only see this in binondo! (fyi: trying to joke here)
