So, since I am in the midst of planning a wedding overseas, the likelihood that the entries here will be mostly about wedding preps in the coming months are high if I do get to post at all.
It's been a struggle and I have gotten into arguments here and there considering my perfectionist and controlling attitude despite the fact that I don't have access to see first-hand the tiny details. I take my time to do some research before I can make a decision since it's different from actually say attending fairs, speaking with the suppliers and seeing what their outputs are. Thank goodness for w@w and other friends who I get to rely on for feedback and comments.
Setting the date was easy for us because I had wanted a wedding when the Church is already set-up for Christmas so it was either before or immediately after. Due to vacation leaves constraints it is also best to have ours during this time to maximize the company's holiday shutdown schedule. The availability of the Church (non-nego for sentimental reasons) pretty much dictated the exact date which comes the day after he asked for my hand in marriage. This was of course still an issue due to availability of extended family members but I figured we'd appreciate it if they can make adjustments for us. We'd make adjustments for immediate family members but due to my situation as well we'd want it within the said timeframe.
The caterer was also a no-brainer because the h2b has a preference already and I was pretty much ok with it as well. I've seen their work and their food are good as well as their styling.
The videographer we got for a good rate/discount because the photographers I had wanted were on the expensive side. (at least for the budget we set) He was also very responsive to my inquiries and h2b liked his videos as well. Coincidentally, he was the same videographer for a colleague back in 2013. I can still remember aerial shots were new at that time and I liked his work also for the same Church.
The photographer, looks like we are getting somewhat a more expensive one which we didn't expect and could only dream of. We got a good discount and some freebie which got us excited considering his mark in the wedding industry so went ahead. I am having some apprehensions though because I am somewhat intimidated now of the glamour shots that I am seeing from his posts. I am not sure I want those. I think I like candid shots more and some special effects (bokehs, creative lighting) than glamour shots. I am not sure if this will become a fit for us in the end. :(
Those are the major ones for now. Of course, we've made good progress on some others but it has come to my attention that I also need to prioritize on the coordinator as the value for money ones look like they are already full or would not accept bookings on our wedding date. Now, this seems to be very critical because apparently from research and my perspective they are more than just directors or assistants running the show on the day but they will also be your decision makers, troubleshooters, managers, and even representatives. As the wedding date gets closer there are a lot of details to manage and having them ensures help for the legwork and to not miss on the small things because they've been doing it a long time.
It seems to me I want more from them than what the typical ones usually offer. I somehow feel that the budget ones will execute what you've thought of and not go beyond that. I want someone I can trust and will have an authority during the day. However, it seems that this will come at a price. Do we want to spend money on it, on something we cannot see or the level of details and coordination needed will not be necessary to avail of their expertise and service as we have a relatively simple one? Also, I have someone back home (namely the groom) who can manage or oversee things considering he is from the Marketing field and has been setting up events somewhat. I am scared I might stress him out though because of the things I want. It's interesting how my concept of the budget can change when I find someone that I like and it is through referrals based on our similarities in taste and criteria. I have managed to win him over and him being generous and understanding has given in to my struggles. And yet, deep down, even though I know I want to have them for our wedding and they will lighten the load and stress for me, I acknowledge that they are expensive. I know I have the ability to stretch my own budget to pay them out of my own pocket but I am hesitating knowing what the groom's thoughts and feelings are. He is aware of my struggle and he is asking me to compromise, to submit to him which I believe is part of our journey - of what will be our marriage. So even if he has given me the Go Signal to pursue this coordinator, I am having second thoughts, re-evaluating, checking for options.
And then, I came across a post which included this line:
"18.) Never base your love on monetary things. Will you still submit to him even if you earn more money than him?"
That hit the target I think. So I might have to let that coordinator go. I may have found another one which is still somewhat over budget but hopefully may be a good compromise for us. I will have to consult and hear his thoughts about it. Hopefully, this will all work out. There's so much I have to fix with all my attitude problems. I started this whole planning process on the wrong foot and I am only now backtracking, taking a step back, trying to keep an open mind, be less sensitive/emotional and aggressive/irritable about it when things don't go my away. I guess, I was a bridezilla in some ways.
It's been a struggle and I have gotten into arguments here and there considering my perfectionist and controlling attitude despite the fact that I don't have access to see first-hand the tiny details. I take my time to do some research before I can make a decision since it's different from actually say attending fairs, speaking with the suppliers and seeing what their outputs are. Thank goodness for w@w and other friends who I get to rely on for feedback and comments.
Setting the date was easy for us because I had wanted a wedding when the Church is already set-up for Christmas so it was either before or immediately after. Due to vacation leaves constraints it is also best to have ours during this time to maximize the company's holiday shutdown schedule. The availability of the Church (non-nego for sentimental reasons) pretty much dictated the exact date which comes the day after he asked for my hand in marriage. This was of course still an issue due to availability of extended family members but I figured we'd appreciate it if they can make adjustments for us. We'd make adjustments for immediate family members but due to my situation as well we'd want it within the said timeframe.
The caterer was also a no-brainer because the h2b has a preference already and I was pretty much ok with it as well. I've seen their work and their food are good as well as their styling.
The videographer we got for a good rate/discount because the photographers I had wanted were on the expensive side. (at least for the budget we set) He was also very responsive to my inquiries and h2b liked his videos as well. Coincidentally, he was the same videographer for a colleague back in 2013. I can still remember aerial shots were new at that time and I liked his work also for the same Church.
The photographer, looks like we are getting somewhat a more expensive one which we didn't expect and could only dream of. We got a good discount and some freebie which got us excited considering his mark in the wedding industry so went ahead. I am having some apprehensions though because I am somewhat intimidated now of the glamour shots that I am seeing from his posts. I am not sure I want those. I think I like candid shots more and some special effects (bokehs, creative lighting) than glamour shots. I am not sure if this will become a fit for us in the end. :(
Those are the major ones for now. Of course, we've made good progress on some others but it has come to my attention that I also need to prioritize on the coordinator as the value for money ones look like they are already full or would not accept bookings on our wedding date. Now, this seems to be very critical because apparently from research and my perspective they are more than just directors or assistants running the show on the day but they will also be your decision makers, troubleshooters, managers, and even representatives. As the wedding date gets closer there are a lot of details to manage and having them ensures help for the legwork and to not miss on the small things because they've been doing it a long time.
It seems to me I want more from them than what the typical ones usually offer. I somehow feel that the budget ones will execute what you've thought of and not go beyond that. I want someone I can trust and will have an authority during the day. However, it seems that this will come at a price. Do we want to spend money on it, on something we cannot see or the level of details and coordination needed will not be necessary to avail of their expertise and service as we have a relatively simple one? Also, I have someone back home (namely the groom) who can manage or oversee things considering he is from the Marketing field and has been setting up events somewhat. I am scared I might stress him out though because of the things I want. It's interesting how my concept of the budget can change when I find someone that I like and it is through referrals based on our similarities in taste and criteria. I have managed to win him over and him being generous and understanding has given in to my struggles. And yet, deep down, even though I know I want to have them for our wedding and they will lighten the load and stress for me, I acknowledge that they are expensive. I know I have the ability to stretch my own budget to pay them out of my own pocket but I am hesitating knowing what the groom's thoughts and feelings are. He is aware of my struggle and he is asking me to compromise, to submit to him which I believe is part of our journey - of what will be our marriage. So even if he has given me the Go Signal to pursue this coordinator, I am having second thoughts, re-evaluating, checking for options.
And then, I came across a post which included this line:
"18.) Never base your love on monetary things. Will you still submit to him even if you earn more money than him?"
That hit the target I think. So I might have to let that coordinator go. I may have found another one which is still somewhat over budget but hopefully may be a good compromise for us. I will have to consult and hear his thoughts about it. Hopefully, this will all work out. There's so much I have to fix with all my attitude problems. I started this whole planning process on the wrong foot and I am only now backtracking, taking a step back, trying to keep an open mind, be less sensitive/emotional and aggressive/irritable about it when things don't go my away. I guess, I was a bridezilla in some ways.
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