puh-lease....

and i thought you got the message! it's so not cute and funny anymore! it's really getting on my nerves! sorry but i think i somehow need to be a little harsh since my indifference and/or indirect hints seems to be not working at all! care to know why i hid this blog for some time before and why i refrain from making posts or why i deleted the archives section? go figure! i'm on the verge of being bitchy! really... so please just stop!

snapshots...c/o she

the girls without mitch...

sinong lasing?:D kamusta naman ang lollipop?:D

isa jan lasing, ung dalawa antok lang talaga!:D

sa uulitin!:D nabitin ako! onti lang nainom ko! ehehe:D

issues...

issues now abound in the yahoogroups just because of two people who dared post their opinions and feelings... i'm not saying their wrong in doing so, but i hope that whatever feelings it will stir among the alumni and the members it will all lead towards improvement of the organization for the better...

sarap sana umepal kaso wag na lng, after all madami din kasi aq nasagasaan na damdamin nung engg week... nde q man kilala kung sinu-sino, alam q meron. naging super sungit and init ulo din kasi aq... nakakalungkot din na may mga sakripisyo kang ginawa pro mararamdaman mo na wala plang naka-appreciate nito... pro d bale ginawa q naman ang mga iyon pra sa org... kasi naramdaman q na kailangan may maibahagi aq...*sigh*

was there any pressure for us to win in the events that we played? i'd like to think there wasn't. it was on maintaining the engg week standing of last year. the pressure came from the fact that we are now a bigger family and that would mean a lot of potential waiting to be harnessed. but the problem is, it was not maximized but utilized just the same. maybe a lot of us expected a lot. we thought we were a strong organization that could outdo what we did last year but two days or so and a lot of default games after we thought boy were we wrong... maybe it just wasn't for us and we have to channel our energies to something else...

i personally felt that we got left behind by mss, who saw our performance last year. as someone i know from mss said, "tingnan mo nga ang alchemes kasing edad lang natin yan pro pang-6 sila last year." didn't we in a way inspire them or served as a benchmark?

bakit naghahanap ng tao? kasi sa 130++ na members na nasubmit as roster, hirap maghanap tuwing umaga... daming default games... what's the problem with the default games? the money that was used for registration! hindi na nga maganda ang financial status may masasayang pa na pera. siguro may pagkakamali rin ang engg week comm or execomm ng org. siguro dapat bago sila nagregister tinanong muna nila ang mga taong isusulat nila kung willing sila. at least kung madefault man at wala namang klase ung taong kasali walang rason kung bakit hindi nila bayaran ang pinangregister dun db? hindi naman ganun kayaman ang org... siguro bago nila sinumbit ang 130++ members sa esc dapat tinanong muna nila ang mga ito kung ok lang ba tlaga sa kanila na kahit papaano ay dumaan ng tambayan at lumahok sa mga laro o kaya'y manood man lang... hindi biro ang 130++ na numero, ayon sa record pangatlo o pang-apat tayo sa may pinakamaraming miyembro...

last year, oo sobrang saya talaga. ngayon pagod ekek... pro pansinin natin, walang awitan last year, walang indakan... may awitan sana kaso nagka-issue din... sino ang mga nasa indakan, sino ang mga nasa awitan ngayon?...

i commend the kids who were given lots of responsibilities, you did well considering that there should have been a senior to guide you.

mga pagmuni-muni

First and foremost, CONGRATULATIONS to jules and the rest of the AWITAN pips! i am so proud and happy for you guys!thank you for sharing whatever gifts you have...

while on my way home last nyt, a lot of stuff ran through my head... and before i knew it i was crying... because of fatigue, of stress, of sadness, and because maybe iyakin lang talaga ako...

hindi naman siguro kaila sa atin lalo na sa mga bibong members na iba ang engg week na ito... puno ng negative emotions... salamat na lng sa magagandang balita tulad ng sa AWITAN... pro sa totoo lng kahit aq kagabi natakot na kahit un ay ipagkait sa atin... ewan ko ba pro kagabi pakiramdam q ay pinagkakaitan Niya tayo... malungkot ako sa mga nangyayari...

hindi naman sa umaasa aq na mag-top tayo sa engg week... hindi naman talaga sukatan iyon ng galing ng isang organisasyon at ng mga miyembro... o hindi nga ba? hindi ba't kahit papaano masasalamin pa rin nito kung paano magbalanse ang mga tao ng kanilang oras, magpagalaw ng mga tao, maging organisado... nasaan na ang 100++ na members? hanggang numero lng ba tayo? kung ganoon ano ang halaga ng ALCHEMES sa iba sa atin, matatambayan para hindi loner? training ground para mapaganda ang resume? libreng meryenda o tanghalian?

let us not forget that if not for the members of this organization who or what will give "UP ALCHEMES" its prestige, its reputation... anong kwenta ng UP ALCHEMES sa resume kung walang mga proyekto ito? mga miyembrong naglilingkod dito, mga miyembrong isinasaalang-alang ang pangalan ng organisasyon...

pro nakakalungkot din na may mga iba sa atin na sinasabi nila mahal nila ang organisasyon, pro hanggang dun lng... hindi ba nila nakikita at nararamdaman na kailangan ng organisasyon ang tulong nila... ang pagmamahal ba ay hanggang sa dahil napapakinang ka ng organisasyon? o may katumbas ding itong pagmamalasakit sa kanya?

dumating na sa puntong nagsusumbatan na, nagsusukatan na, nagsisisihan na... hindi maiiwasan, hindi mo masisisi lalo na ang mga pagod na... kasi naman, kung tulong-tulong at sama-sama wala namang talagang mabigat hindi ba? ang importante may nagawa ka na... kung sinisisi ka pro alam m naman na ngawa m0 na ang bahagi mo o ang kaya mo, pabayaan mo sila! hindi naman sinasabi na mawala na ang UP mula sa UP ALCHEMES pro kung may maibabahagi ka, sana huwag ipagdamot... itanong natin sa ating sarili, mahal ko ba ang org na ito? may nagawa na ba ako? may magagawa pa ba ako?

nangongonsensya ba ako? namimilit ba ako? hindi po... gusto ko lng sabihin ang mga saloobin ko... kung tinamaan ka, mabuti, nakakaramdam ka pa... kung hindi, wala ka lang marahil pakialam o magkaiba tau ng pananaw... sapagkat hindi naman dahil sa nasa iisa taung bubong ay kinakailangang pare-pareho ang takbo ng ating pag-iisip...

sabi ko sa ating presidente, magalit ka na kaya o kaya'y may umiyak na satin sa harap nila... ngunit dali ko itong binawi... bakit? pra saan, para manlimos ng awa? pra may mapagtsismisan ang iba? pra magbulung-bulongan tayo... kailangan pa bang humantong sa ganoon? besides, even if someone cries, only a handful will care, be driven to work... the rest they will feel sorry, sympathize for a while, and then poof!

nakakalungkot na nagkakaganito tayo bilang isang pamilya... may lumulutang pa na mga paksyon... bakit ganun? personal glory? wag naman sana...

have fun... hindi na yan ang nangyayari... mediocre na ang performance natin, nakukuntento na tayo dun kahit na alam natin sa ating mga sarili na higit pa tayo dun! nadedeactivate na ang marami sa atin...

hanga ako kina ate iris, ate jone, nagawa nilang pagsabayin... alam ko na marami akong pagkukulang din... patalo pa ako sa mga nasalihan ko kahapon... hirap pa akong magcommit sa mga bagay-bagay...marami na rin akong hindi alam sa mga nangyayari at lahat ng ito'y batay lamang sa katiting na alam ko... hanga ako kina jose, paul, gemma, ryan, nina, mga GC kung tutuusin pro nung engg week napaka-visible nila...magaling lang talaga sila...

sa mga new mems na napasabak agad, sana huwag kayong mapagod...
sa mga kumukulo ang dugo sa kabila, hinay lang... sana maintindahan ninyo ang puntong, hindi natin kinakailangang makipagsabayan sa pambababoy nila... dun tayo sa rason, sa prinsipyo. wag na lang natin sila pansinin, at sa halip ay ibuhos ang ating lakas sa lalong pagpapaganda sa ating ngalan... mas magandang armas pa rin kasi ang rason, kung alam mong nasa tama ka, anong laban nila db?

there's a difference from being the "best we can be" from being the "best among the rest". One is more rewarding. and we don't always have to be the best among the rest... EXCELLENCE above all!

WARNENG'G

the war begins...
ang sa 'kin lng tirahin m na ang org as a whole wla lng personalan...
FOUL!!!
org bashing pa ba un?... kakaiba...
pro ang lam q, alang taong bobo, tanga pa siguro! 'NDE kami 'yon!

ENGG WEEK NA!

ala lng, sarap sumulyap.... cute tlaga ni hotness....:D hehe:D

lots of things running through my head.... have to think about all of them but at this point since it's "THE" week in the college, i just want to shut off and be on EW mode or petiks mode! but no! have to balance lots of stuff.... and to top it all, my grandfather (mother side), died yesterday... sadness...

got a dilemma, was talking non-stop with a colleague of mine saying some nasty things against the administration(people) of the college, and then lo and behold the associate dean was like just behind us! uh-oh! huuuu....

wonder what happened sa SMOKERS' night ngaun? too bad wasn't able to stay for long... sayang... kakaiba 'tong araw na 'to... wasn't able to hear Mass pa.... huuu... "TAKTENG'G BUHAY"... ung grad pic q ala pa nga din pla.... saya! pasaway na F3!

0% interest 2m! (tix @60 featuring 6cycle mind, sandwich, mayonaise, etc....) hope it stops raining na....

miss this blog

miss blogging... in due time... think it's gonna be ok again... the reason i hid this blog/refrained from updating it? sikwet! hehe:D

>>>>ala lang, trip kong song ngaun though not necessarily reflects what i feel....relaxing kasi<<<<<

Rascal Flatts - Bless The Broken Road

I set out on a narrow way many years ago
Hoping I would find true love along the broken road
But I got lost a time or two
Wiped my brow and kept pushing through
I couldn't see how every sign pointed straight to you
Every long lost dream lead me to where you are
Others who broke my heart they were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you
I think about the years I spent just passing through
I'd like to have the time I lost and give it back to you
But you just smile and take my hand
You've been there you understand
It's all part of a grander plan that is coming true
Every long lost dream lead me to where you are
Others who broke my heart they were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you

Christmas Celebrations at UP Diliman

This year's Christmas event will be dubbed "Kanya2 2gether sa PasQ". It typifies UP's ultimate basis for unity: agreeing to disagree. It celebrates, with the youthful pinache of text lingo, our invigorating freedom and daunting diversity in one ideal space we call home: the academic oval. It allows us to congratulate one another's work in anextended 4 day festival of the best of UP Diliman where before we were incognito revelers in a tightly squeezed crowd on Lantern Parade night.

The oval will be shut off from all forms of vehicular traffic for 4days from Dec. 12-15 to allow us to stroll with leisure in a tentcity atmosphere that features the best accomplishments of UP's academe and student organizations. Large white Murayama tents (12' x12') will line the inner academic oval which will be zoned into academic, student orgs, dry goods tiangge and food concessions areas.

The Carillon will sound Christmas Carols at 5 pm daily beginning onDec. 2 followed by the lighting of Quezon Hall signaling the beginning of celebrations. Awards for best academic and student org tents and best Parol per booth will be awarded along with a Belen competition among college student councils. One-hour daily concerts will be held at dusk in succession at the Quezon, Melchor and Palma Halls to be capped by a Rock/Reggae/Acoustic Amateur Bands Concert at the sunken garden on the evening of the 15th till the following morning followed by an Ecumenical Simbang Gabi.

Student and Academic pakulô events such as the APO's Oblation Run atthe oval at noon of the 15th and Beta Epsilon's Fireworks Display after the Lantern Parade on the evening of the 15th will be screened, scheduled and printed on flyer itineraries. The traditional LanternParade will be headed, thematized and choreographed by the College of Fine Arts. The theme will be Earth, Wind, Fire and Water Elemental Masks. It will parade once around the oval and pick-up the academic/student booth lanterns along the way.

Let us prove yet again that with a little imagination, even austerity cannot douse the spirit of celebration in Diliman.

Paunang pagbati ng maligayang Pasko!

Gerry Cao
Chancellor

LET IT GO

thanks to ate jo, for posting it sa groups! what a timing! shux! as in super swak!

Let it go
by T. D. Jakes
There are people who can walk away from you; and hear me when I tell you this! When people can walk away from you: let them walk.
I don't want you to try to talk another person into staying with you, loving you, calling you, caring about you, coming to see you, staying attached to you. I mean hang up the phone.
When people can walk away from you let them walk. Your destiny is never tied to anybody that left. The Bible said that, they came out from us that it might be made manifest that they were not for us. For had they been of us, no doubt they would have continued with us. [1 John 2:19]People leave you because they are not joined to you. And if they are not joined to you, you can't make them stay. Let them go. And it doesn't mean that they are a bad person it just means that their part in the story is over. And you've got to know when people's part in your story is over so that you don't keep trying to raise the dead. You've got to know when it's dead.
You've got to know when it's over. Let me tell you something. I've got the gift of good-bye. It's the tenth spiritual gift, I believe in good-bye. It's not that I'm hateful, it's that I'm faithful, and I know whatever God means for me to have He'll give it to me. And if it takes too much sweat I don't need it. Stop begging people to stay. Let them go!!
If you are holding on to something that doesn't belong to you and was never intended for your life, then you need to...LET IT GO!!!
If you are holding on to past hurts and pains ...LET IT GO!!!
If someone can't treat you right, love you back, and see your worth LET IT GO!!!
If someone has angered you ... LET IT GO!!!
If you are holding on to some thoughts of evil and revenge...LET IT GO!!!If you are involved in a wrong relationship or addiction ... LET IT GO!!!
If you are holding on to a job that no longer meets your needs or talents... LET IT GO!!!
If you have a bad attitude...LET IT GO!!!
If you keep judging others to make yourself feel better... LET IT GO!!!
If you're stuck in the past and God is trying to take you to a new level in Him... LET IT GO!!!
If you are struggling with the healing of a broken relationship....LET IT GO!!!
If you keep trying to help someone who won't even try to help themselves...LET IT GO!!!
If you're feeling depressed and stressed.... LET IT GO!!!
If there is a particular situation that you are so used to handling yourself and God is saying "take your hands off of it," then you need to... LET IT GO!!!
Let the past be the past. Forget the former things. GOD is doing a new thing !!! LET IT GO!!!
Get Right or Get Left... Think about it, and then LET IT GO!!!
"The Battle is the Lord's!"

na naman

WARNING: MUSHY! (take necessary precaution!)... wrote this last nyt...

>>>START
I will shut that door but for now let me be. let me wander in this barren land.

*** enter music:
I'm a big, big girl
in a big, big world
it's not a big, big thing
if you leave me
but i do, do feel
that i do, do will
miss you much... (miss you much)
***end music

I will always be haunted by the fact that I was so afraid of getting hurt i ended up inflicting more pain to myself than they could have. And yet I must be vigilant so that like what kathleen said (thanks for those chats super!) I will not miss "it" the third time...

so i guess this goodbye... (for real)...

i'm really starting to hate my NBSB status. it sucks big time!

thank you still for the numerous things I've learned much because of you guys...much as i want to write it all here i still can't. must keep something for myself. pro grabe i've written bout u (the other one) so many times na pla! ahaha:D although i can count 4 other na i didn't name! ehehe:D aus! *wag kang mag-alala/di ko ipipilit sau*

***Enough drama cue music: numa numa ye (maia hi maia hu)/move your body gurl!
WHE & BBQ MODE: ON!

P. S. Good luck and God bless to my best pal Patrick. I'm excited for you! :D

>>>STOP

***feelin better already. though still a bit woozy... aftershock... not bitter just sad...

*poof*

just like that.... *poof*... it became koko crunch! >>> corny i know... sadness...

blame it on harboring hidden desires... maling akala... me and my overly active imagination!

haaaaaay.... prang gusto q makasession si MP ngaun ah! tsktsk! anyone care to join? pat, painom ka after ng board m, pra may excuse aq! wahehe:D nah, not really.... not that sad! but still sad...

*fly away... sadness... *

*pasukan na naman, engg week na naman. buti naman. busy na naman. saya, perfect diversion...*

lotsa things

starting to feel a lil dizzy trying to do lots of stuff, and thinking about what needs to be done by today, what i need to do tom, etc... whew! courtesy call (ma'am gene and then sir happy), log rep, fax sponsorship proposals, remind acadcomm, what's happenengg (esp engg voice), notes/documents, permits, *breathe!* need to take notes! mahirap na pag may nakalimutan! ehehe:D

miss these people: (HS friends)

Chinky's "instant" bday blow-out! ehehe:D

felt good to hang out with them! simpleng tambay lng sa gitna ng kalsada ng 9pm. aus! "kanya-kanyang session!" nyahaha!:D love you guys! see you this friday ulit?:D hopefully tuloy... yet to ask my mom/dad's permission... hehe:D *fingers crossed*

current addictions

• fly away (longest yard OST)
• blue sky (thanks to cha!)
• ever after
• being tipsy/borderline drunk! (now i know why he likes drinking! share the same sentiments now! nyahaha!)
• hotness hang-over!

damn it! just found out that i got a grade of 2 in sts! damn! so much for hoping for that cum laude! oh well, that's life! haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyy.......... waaaaaaah! sadness......

worse, got an INC in my supposedly last PE! what the heck happened? shocks, thank God for CRS Grades Viewing. or else.... what to do?! sadness...

* if i could fly away, i won't come back * ... sadness...

ending...

the sem has ended. another one's starting, and hopefully my last....

my heart goes out to the following people for being caring, dedicated, passionate.... and something else in between...
ate kim - though it was all a blur for me, thank you for being there. i know you were tired and everything and that you could have left just as easily to rest. you decided to stay... i didn't ask you to (did i?) but you stayed.... thank you very much. and i'm sorry for the added strain i gave you, for tiring you out even more. it didn't occur to me before that we'll be close but then again i am thankful. i don't know (until now) exactly what happened after that last shot of MP, maybe i've said too much which was a given for most drunk people. i kinda liked it though talking non-stop. but anyway, thank you for putting up with me. i prefer listening to people but lately i don't really do much talking of what's inside maybe because i don't even know what's really deep down inside and all i know is that at this point i am sad. nevertheless, thank you for listening... thank you for being a dedicated mommy to us all. i was amazed with your dedication considering that "your time" for showing such dedication to the org has "ended". what i mean by this is that it really was our time (younger members of the org) to do our part. and i am sorry for my shortcomings on that one. and you shouldn't worry if you might be inactive next semester because as what i've said before, you've done your part... we should understand that... and it's now our turn. and as halley always says, belonging is different from being involved (or something to that effect). sad to say, i have my shortcomings on that one. hands down to you ate kim. alabshu!

cy - sorry at naabala kita ng sobra. you were sort of in the "wrong place" when i got drunk. sorry i got you involved pa. kung tutuusin hindi nmn tlga tau close but when i got wasted umalalay ka. thank you. sorry tlga and thank you.

mark san gabriel - tenchu tenchu very much too esp for getting my bag upstairs when i knew i could no longer manage going up myself. and i'm sorry for all the hassle.

riyann - sorry for being too straightforward. that was so tactless of me.

emer - ayos! salamat sa pagsabay or rather pagtatangkang simabay sa akin magswing ehehe:D

to the rest of the gang that i've "disturbed" (some i can't even remember at all):jervik, lynius, angelle, mae, bart, nikki, jake - sorry for all the hassle. either way you enjoyed yourself dn nmn sa spectacle, ayt jake?:D

nikki - CONGRATULATIONS! and thank you very much! you did great! for whatever shortcomings you felt before what you did for this sem-ender more than makes up for them. continue what you're doing and i hope that you can inspire more of your batchmates to be as active and as involved as you are.

appcomm: kenneth, mae, tina, ayza, leian, janelle esp to lila and katre - CONGRATS! and sorry! admittedly though i wanted to be part of this committee so much i wasn't that effective at all.i do hope though that in my own little way i was able to contribute something. again CONGRATS and sorry.

sa food comm esp bryan, mae, angelle, cy, dani, jervik, riyann, fem, bods at ate kim ulit: salamat sa inyo at may masarap na nilamon ang mga tao.
bucks - salamat at kinuha m ang manok sa marikina kahit mag-isa m lng at napagod ka pa dahil dun. thank you for your dedication to the organization. i am amazed at your dedication to the organization and i do hope that it will not falter or fade. i hope you'll not grow tired of this organization.

halley - buddy ko! astig ka! like what i always say to some of my batchmates if it weren't for you we'd be so scared when the time comes that your batch will be the seniors. keep it up! and God Bless!

jake, fem, al, dani, jp, the execomm - CONGRATS! tuloy nio lng. 2nd sem na plano kau mabuti. mabigat ang sem na darating. God Bless you guys!

alumni na nagpunta: ate adi, kuya joe, kuya iman, ate ja, ate mau at kahit sa mga nde nakarating - sa patuloy na pagsuporta sa org!

UP ALCHEMES - my family in UP. without this org my college life will be a whole lot sad. i hope i won't forget to give back something especially financially after i graduate considering what this org has given me. something valueable no amount of money can replace. the lessons, the camaraderie, the experiences, the insights, the passion.... GO UP ALCHEMES!!!!!!!!!